February 2022
1 min readApr 16, 2022
Bad2:42 PMSchool
Good sleep
Snacks
Lonely
Sad
Anxious
Frustrated
Guilty
UnmotivatedIt’s weird
how my days go.Like
I was exhausted all day.Just
genuinely exhausted.And
I used to be able to
hide it more.But
I just really don't wanna be
here.And
I can't pretend that I do
in the same way
cause
it feels soooooo fake.More than fake.And
I feel guilty
and
embarrassed
from yesterday.Which
is the worst.Cause
I can't change anything,
but
I just feel
horrible.Like
why'd I have multiple meltdowns.Get it together
pleaseeee.Then
I put so much pressure on myself,
in some relationships.I just
really can't handle this.And
tomorrow
I gotta do it all fucking again.Lunch was bad.I tried
to sit there
for longer.I set a time for myself,
but
I couldn't.I was just trying to stay for
3 more
minutes.But
I couldn’t.So
I left.And
I sat by myself.This feeling sucks.I woke up wayyy late
and
already felt like I was gonna cry and freak outOn top of that
I’m mad
at myself
for feeling like this.And
part of me
feels like
I'm making it up.But
some of it
I know
I can’t be.
